Build Your Personal Brand: Own Your Strengths with Farah Miltimore

What if the traits you’ve been told to tone down are what make you stand out? Nika joins personal branding and social media coach Farah Miltimore to explore how embracing your unique strengths can help you build an authentic personal brand.

Learn how to recognize your “superpower,” move through self-doubt and fear of rejection, and connect with people by showing up as yourself. Farah also shares her journey from network marketing to coaching—and why prioritizing joy and self-care changed her approach to life and business.

For female entrepreneurs balancing ambition, family, and their own needs, this conversation offers a fresh perspective on building a brand that reflects who you are.

CONNECT WITH THE GUEST:

• Website: https://linktr.ee/itsauthenticme
• Social Media: https://www.instagram.com/farahmiltimore

Transcript

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Discovering Your Superpower Through Personal Branding

NIka Lawrie 0:34

Hey everybody , thank you so much for joining me today . I'm super excited about my guest . You guys are going to absolutely love her . She is a social media and personal branding coach and she focuses on helping her clients build businesses online , also while building a solid brand , but she does something that is super , super cool and super unique that I absolutely love . She helps people identify and draw out their superpower and use it as a tool to make them unstoppable . Farrah , thank you so much for joining me . How are you today ?

Farah Miltimore 1:09

Thanks , Nika . Thanks for the awesome intro . I am fantastic . Thank you for having me . I'm so excited to be here and to kind of have this conversation and to share the importance of superpower and how everyone has one . I love it .

NIka Lawrie 1:22

Totally so . Can you tell me a little bit about what compelled you to become a social media and personal branding coach ? And then also , how did you come up with the idea of helping people find their superpower , identify their superpower ?

Farah Miltimore 1:38

Yeah , of course . So I am . The starting to be a social media and personal branding coach was mostly because I started in . I started my online business career in network marketing . So I started that about , I'd say , seven years ago . I had just had my kids and I was at home and I was a realtor at that point . So I was , my husband was working Monday to Friday , 9 to 5 out of the house , and then I would be out of the house really from 5 pm till 10 pm and gone on weekends . So time freedom was completely gone for us . We spent time with kids , but separately because we weren't home at the same time .

Farah Miltimore 2:18

So network marketing came in and I jumped into that field and from there I learned a lot about social media and I learned a lot about personal branding and what it meant to stand out online instead of kind of getting lost in the circle and in the cycles of social media . And from there , when I realized that my network marketing adventure was coming to an end , I picked up the things that I really loved about what I was doing . So I did that for about four years and I lost joy in what I was doing . So it's like , okay , what parts of that job do I really love , what parts do I excel in ? And I realized that one I love coaching and I love training people and I love seeing them have that something ignite in them . And I had learned social media ins and outs as I was building this online business , so I thought I might as well use that , because I'm good at it and I love it and I've built a community .

Farah Miltimore 3:16

So I wanted to teach other people how to build a community versus just accumulating followers , and I thought I might as well throw personal branding in as well , because you're selling a product or a service , people need to know why you , what makes you you , why should I , you know , come to you instead of someone else ?

Farah Miltimore 3:36

So that's kind of where this job came from Superpowers . Superpowers came from understanding and seeing that everyone was so different in such a brilliant way . Yeah , yeah , I love that Right and like , regardless of if we're all doing the same thing and if we all have the same job , people are going to gravitate towards you because of what makes you you and a lot of the time , life and , you know , families and situations may end up suppressing our superpowers at a very young age where we're told , you know , not to do certain things , not to speak a certain way , not to you know , feel certain ways that our superpowers are actually diminished and then looked at as our weaknesses . But what I found was , when we kind of bring those things back to light and up to surface , it's what distinguishes us from the rest .

NIka Lawrie 4:36

I'm glad you said that , because I was going to ask what exactly do you mean by a superpower ? So obviously it's not , you know , being able to , not being able to fly or running super fast or something . No , that is some people's superpower .

Farah Miltimore 4:48

Yeah .

NIka Lawrie 4:51

But in depth , what do you mean by drawing out somebody's superpower ?

Farah Miltimore 4:56

So drawing out someone's superpower . What I usually do with my clients or my workshops or whatever it is , is I want people to think of . What was it that people told you you were too much of when you were growing up ? Right , did you talk too much ? Were you too sensitive ? Were you too hyper ? It doesn't matter . We were all told we were too much of something . So for me it was you're too sensitive , you cry too much and you talk too much .

Farah Miltimore 5:22

So , as I'm rebuilding myself and I'm , you know , reinventing myself and changing what I was doing for a career I realized that those are my strengths , the things that people said you know you talk too much . Well , then I turned that into being able to train and teach people and to coach people in a way where my my thing was was breaking through and helping them change their lives and change their businesses . And then , with the being too sensitive , you switch that right , you flip the script on these things and you go okay . Well , if I'm sensitive , then I must be vulnerable , and if my vulnerability is my courage , then I might as well use that on my platforms to show people a side of me that maybe they haven't seen before , or a side that connects them .

Farah Miltimore 6:06

Another thing is , unfortunately , a lot of women are told that they are too aggressive or too assertive , or too much of something , or you have too much knowledge , and what we do and what I do is help people transition that into well , how do you use that to really then ? How do you use that to set yourself apart ? If you're knowledgeable , then use that knowledge and share your value . Show people why that knowledge is so important . Um , and be confident , right , be confident in who you are and what makes you you and be able to open up , because once we do open up and we show people that side of ourselves on our platforms and in person , it builds that like trust , follow , and that's kind of what we're , what we're trying to get to in building authentic relationships online .

NIka Lawrie 7:02

So other than you know , kind of being told not to do one of those things as a child , why do you think people struggle so much with identifying those things ? I mean it kind of it's almost related to your purpose , like we really struggle to find your purpose . What are the reasons we're struggling with those things ?

Farah Miltimore 7:21

Honestly , I think that people struggle because of ego sometimes gets in the way when we're too scared to really show ourselves off , in a feeling that we may be rejected , that we're too much to handle , that we may make some people uncomfortable , but really these things are on the people that are receiving Right Right . So , if you know , if sometimes you may say something that makes someone uncomfortable , it's them that needs to question why it makes them uncomfortable , and not you . You're going to make people uncomfortable , whether you like it or not . You're not going to be everyone's cup of tea , but I think we hold back because we're too nervous to put ourselves out there in the fear that we're going to get hurt , that someone's going to say something that we're not going to be , that our perception of who we are versus our perception that other people think that we are are not the same and that we're going to be like well , I don't like this side of you .

Farah Miltimore 8:27

We have to step into our power and go . Well , I understand that you may not like this side of me , but this is me . There are no other sides of me , you know . So I'm going to step up into my power and really show up in order to progress and whatever we want to go forward in . But I think we do hold back because we're usually just , we're scared , we're scared , yeah , or do , or worse , think and talk about us behind our backs . Right , that's our , I think that's our fear .

NIka Lawrie 8:58

I love it . So I heard Jay Shetty said it a while ago , who was on a podcast , and I heard him say it and hopefully I get this right . But you are what you think they think you are . So it's all about your perspective of what you think that they're thinking , but it's not necessarily the truth , and so I love that you're recognizing that

Embracing Joy and Finding Superpowers

NIka Lawrie 9:19

.

Farah Miltimore 9:20

Yeah , totally , and we sometimes shy away from the things that make us the happiest and the things that bring us the most joy because they may be not your norm .

Farah Miltimore 9:32

So when people found out that I was leaving my network marketing job , they were floored . They were like you're doing so well . We thought this was a lifetime thing . I'm like , I wasn't happy , right , right , I wasn't happy , I was miserable , I wasn't . You know , I was doing the job and with every time I I clicked a button or sent a message , I felt just didn't feel right anymore . So I had to choose my joy and step into my power in order to make those changes for the long run and in order for me to , you know , accelerate in what I do want to do and how I do . Going to ask is what were some of the personal changes that you had to make in order to really identify ?

NIka Lawrie 10:17

your own superpower and to really make the change to get to where you are today . I know you mentioned changing your career or redesigning that , but were there other things that you had to work through or overcome ?

Farah Miltimore 10:38

Yeah , I had to get really selfish . So , as a mom and as a wife , parts of you are taken away , in a sense , not taken away , but parts of you diminish , pulled in different directions . You're pulled in different directions . You wear so many hats , you play so many different roles that you and your essence in yourself kind of take a backseat to everything else . So I I guess it was 2018 decided that I couldn't put myself on the back burner anymore . I really had to take care of myself . I was overweight . I grew up overweight . I was an overweight child . I had lap band surgery , which is a weight loss surgery , when I was 18 .

Farah Miltimore 11:35

No-transcript , I was miserable . I wasn't happy in myself . Everything else was great , right ? People hear , oh , she wasn't happy , everything must've been a disaster , but it really wasn't . My home life was great . My husband was so loving and so unconditionally loving . My kids were happy and healthy . Everything was going well .

Farah Miltimore 11:55

But I had put myself in the back corner of my mind for so long that I had really lost who I was . Yeah , yeah , I can very much relate to that , and that changes , right ? We expect it to change when we become mothers and we become wives and we make these decisions in our life that changes . You change , of course , but that doesn't mean that I have to lose who I am as a person . So I decided to get really self-made . I decided that if whatever didn't bring me , joy was going to get cut in my life , and I had to reintroduce joy into my life because I had forgotten what it felt like . I had forgotten what it felt like to be happy when I looked in the mirror . I had forgotten what it felt like to really accept and love myself and give myself the grace when I needed it .

Farah Miltimore 12:43

So 2018 was pivotal for me , because that was the year I decided I needed a career change , but I also needed a lifestyle change for myself . So I started intuitively eating . I yo-yoed and weighed my entire life , so I knew diets weren't the answer for me . Yeah , so I started eating foods that made me happy . Yeah , started eating the things that made me feel good about myself .

Farah Miltimore 13:11

And then , step by step , little moves , like getting a gym membership was the first move . It was okay , I'm just going to get the membership , that's it . I got the membership . Then it was okay , go to the gym once or twice a week . And then that has now translated to about four to five times a week , me doing some sort of exercise and for the first time in my life , I dropped weight effortlessly because I healed .

Farah Miltimore 13:35

I healed that part of myself that was so sad and so broken and thought that I didn't deserve the joy and I didn't deserve to be happy . But then I made myself center stage , which is something that's really hard to do . So that was my shift . It was getting selfish , making myself a priority and just really sitting there and thinking what's making me happy , what's bringing me the most joy , what are the things I do in my business , in my everyday life , that just ignite my soul and make me feel really , really good . Those are the things I stuck with . That's what helped me step up and step into my power and to really evolve into what I call Farrah 4.0 .

NIka Lawrie 14:18

Now , I love that . Yeah , I'm on probably Nika 6.0 or something but I love it .

Farah Miltimore 14:30

Yeah , we evolve , we change , things are different , but , um , so yeah , those were the steps that I took to really did a self audit . Self-awareness is so key , oh , it's so key . I had to sit there and go , okay , well , what's holding me , what pain am I feeling , what are the things I'm holding on to , who are the people I need to just forgive and let go and release , and all that kind of stuff , and that really helped me step up and step into where I am now .

NIka Lawrie 14:54

I love that . That's amazing and it's such a powerful story because I think so many of us struggle in very similar ways . We have our own path and our own journey , but so many of us can relate to your situation and how you've overcome . It's just beautiful .

Farah Miltimore 15:11

Oh , thank you . It's a part of what I love doing is , like I said , I'm too sensitive , so my vulnerability is something that I share , because I never want people to feel like they're alone in whatever it is they're going through . So even when we do my coaching and my consulting , we always start with what's holding you back . What is it ? What's making you feel like you're less than amazing ? What's making you feel that you don't have a superpower that you've already found ? And then , from there , breaking that negative self-talk is what really eventually brings out those superpowers where people go . I'm so amazing at this and I'm like I know , I already knew , but I was waiting for you to say it , so you also talk about owning it like owning your superpower .

NIka Lawrie 16:06

So once we've kind of overcome those struggles , we've identified it and we've even kind of managed to change that negative self-talk , how do we really own that superpower and turn it into something that can change our life ?

Farah Miltimore 16:19

Practice , practice . When I kind of first started all of this , people always said to me you know , you got to be grateful , gratitude . Gratitude is an attitude . And I was like , okay , it's an attitude , so I'm grateful for everything . But then things weren't changing and then someone said to me you can't have just an attitude of gratitude , you have to practice it .

Farah Miltimore 16:42

And that comes with anything , with any confidence . These things are skills . These are not things that we are built with . I wasn't a confident person . I wasn't really a confident child or teenager just because of what had already been pre-programmed in my subconscious . Confidence is something that I had to work on , was a skill I needed to build , was something I needed to learn .

Farah Miltimore 17:07

So really stepping up and owning your power is about practicing those things . So if you find out that you're really good at motivating people or inspiring them , practice , post in your Insta story . Write something for your Instagram wall , do a Facebook post , you know . Record a quick little two minute video and start practicing that and seeing how it feels . If it feels right and if it feels good , practice some more . Do a little more . If it , you know , whatever it is . If you're really good at fitness or nutrition or , you know , learn more about it , practice more , become a sponge and that's how you end up owning those things and really accepting them is when you are so set , when you're like I know all the things and you may not know all the things , but in your heart and soul you're like , okay , I'm good , like I'm set . This feels right now and now I can move into it . Um , so I think it takes . It takes practice .

NIka Lawrie 18:14

I love that Were there ? Were there any resources that helped you along the way while you found your superpower and really learned to own it ?

Farah Miltimore 18:22

Yeah , I um , I started reading a lot more than I used to , but by reading I mean audio books , because I'm more of a listen than I am a read . I try to read but I have kids that are running around . It's hard to sit down and get a book in . So I started listening to a lot of podcasts over a super soul conversations . I think I've listened to every conversation from people that have already been there , people that have been there and that have broken through .

Farah Miltimore 18:53

I think the power in a person's story is on the other end of it . Once we've gone through what we're supposed to go through , the sharing and being able to help people learn from what we've already learned . I think it was very

Finding Joy Through Daily Non-Negotiables

Farah Miltimore 19:07

powerful for me . So , listening to podcasts , the book the Untethered Soul , really helped me understand where I was and where I was going . Detaching from outcome that was something . Learning that was and removing expectation and timelines and that kind of stuff . Learning those things and having those resources really helps . So , like Eckhart Tolle and well , tom , I can never pronounce his last name right , tom , I think it starts with a , b , it's the B .

NIka Lawrie 19:44

I know , I know , Willow . Yeah , I know exactly . I'll . I'll tag him in our note . Okay , perfect . Yeah , because I know exactly who you're talking about .

Farah Miltimore 19:53

Um , and anyone and everyone really that had a message that resonated with me . So all the all the mentors and and friends , friends really helped . I called in a brand new group of friends that I didn't even know I needed , um , and they showed up and it just it's nice to talk to people about the things that you may be feeling and the things that you're going through and and get a new perspective on things . I had a friend once tell me . She said you know , I kept telling her I'm stuck , like I feel like I'm stuck , I don't know what I'm doing , I don't know where I'm going . And she said to me you know you're doing the things that you can do , but are you doing the things that you should do ? So I want you to sit with that and really think about it . So , having people on my side that really helped me grow and progress , those are great resources to have too , and checking in with those people when you have questions .

NIka Lawrie 20:56

I think it's so important to really take assessment of the people you surround yourself with . Are these motivating people ? Are they positive people ? Are they people that might be hurting you , even if they're not intentionally hurting you ? Are they holding you back or saying things to you that stick in your head that might not be a good thing to have stuck in your head . So really taking assessment of those friends and those influences oh , it's so important . Yeah , yeah , so I love you . Talk about you know , putting the joy back in the equation , or you know , and using that to build your life . Why do so many people struggle with finding joy and how might we go about finding it in our own lives ?

Farah Miltimore 21:41

I think we're pre-programmed to eat , sleep , work Um , absolutely , even from a young age . The way our school systems are set up you sit at a desk , you sit quietly , you do your work , you get marked , you go home , you play a little , you do do your homework , you go to bed um , so we are , we're programmed for a productive society that has forgotten how to have fun and forgotten how to just live life and to understand that the thrill of life is not the money we make and we buy , it's about . The thrill of life is just living life and being happy that you got to wake up , and I think that a lot of the time is taken for granted . Our breathing is taken for granted .

Farah Miltimore 22:37

I used to wake up a ball of stress every morning , you know , with a to-do list and you know , or thinking about bills that had to be paid and all that other stuff , and I sapped the joy right out of my own life . I stopped living . I was just living to make money and to make sure that bills were paid , and forgetting that everything was always taken care of , if I would just let that go , and that things always , at the end , as hard as they were , would always work out . Yeah , Understanding that , but I think we have forgotten .

NIka Lawrie 23:17

Yeah , I think it's . I think it's a really freeing thing to understand that that things always do work out Like you may . You may hit rock bottom , but if you wake up the next day you have the opportunity to change that rock bottom . And so there is this sense of life always just keeps going forward , and so if you kind of keep that perspective , it makes things a little bit less scary maybe .

Farah Miltimore 23:41

Yeah , but it's hard when everything around you tells you opposite right , or the way that we were raised , or just you know , society in general is a we are a outcome-based , productivity , hustle-based society where , like , if you're not consistently and constantly producing and doing more and more and getting more and more , they tell you that you shouldn't be happy . Right , we depict people that are poor as people that are sad , but that may not be the truth . That could be far from it . You could have someone that doesn't have a lot of money , that is happier than some of the wealthiest people in the world . So I think joy has been taken out of our lives in order to increase things that , at the end of the day , I don't think matter . Of course they matter . It keeps us alive and it keeps the world going . But I think the most important thing is to find joy in your business , joy when you're . You know if you're writing a post for your social media , is it making you happy writing it and is it going to make your community happy when they read it ? Or are they going to connect with it to a point where , like , they understand where you're coming from , from a position , not if you're trying to sell them something or that you're just trying to gain more followers ? Are they getting it from a genuine piece of you that , even if it is a sales post , it's easier for them to digest because they're like okay , she really means this or he really means this , so I should sign up for this or I should buy this ? Um , and to your second question bringing joy back into your life .

Farah Miltimore 25:20

Um , for me , was creating three non-negotiables for the day . So , regardless of my to-do list , regardless of what you know had to be done , I had to exercise my body every day , at least 15 minutes . Even if it was a quick walk around the block didn't matter . I had to move my body . Um , because I started to understand that moving my body was making me feel better . Yeah , yeah , it makes you feel good . Um , so , moving my body , exercising the body , exercising the brain . So for me , that's my meditation . So I try to get in 20 minutes a day . And first , meditation felt scary for me because I didn't know what it was . We have the misconceived notion that you have to sit and close your eyes for an hour and be , still and be completely quiet .

Farah Miltimore 26:17

So for me , meditation started with closing my eyes and a friend taught me this and picturing a basket in front of me and then taking all the things I was feeling it , putting it in that basket and then pushing it away till I couldn't see it anymore . That's how I started . It's really great . It's a really great starter point because it helps with visualization . It helps people understand that their thoughts are literally just thoughts that they can push out of . So because then , when it's outside , it's out of mind , and when it's out of mind , you feel this ease .

Farah Miltimore 26:49

So , or exercising the brain can be reading , or listening to your favorite podcast or whatever it is , but something that's going to feed your brain , um . And then the third one is doing something that brings me joy , whether it taking my kids out for ice cream , or eating something delicious , or getting coffee with a friend , or even , you know , calling my mom on the phone that day something that's outside of your norm , something that's outside of your daily to do list , that makes you smile . Um , even if it is connecting with your community online , like for me , that's something that does make me smile . So I make sure that I'm in my Instagram story on the daily talking to my community . Seeing how everyone's doing that makes me happy .

NIka Lawrie 27:34

Yeah .

Farah Miltimore 27:35

So implementing my three non-negotiables really helped me bring that joy back into my life and understanding that if I'm not happy then it's really hard to live , to keep a happy home as well .

NIka Lawrie 27:49

Absolutely . Yeah , yeah , I love that . Yeah , I really love that . I think it's such a simple thing . You know , people think , like in their busy lives I don't have time to exercise or I don't have time to meditate or whatever . But you know , you've , you've drawn it out so perfectly , like it's not that much investment , it's just a matter of making it a priority , making it a non-negotiable .

Farah Miltimore 28:13

It's just a matter of making it a priority , making it a non-negotiable , totally . I think that's so important . I've fallen into that trap . We all fall into the I don't have the time , and I think , instead of telling people to make sacrifices because that feels heavy and then people go , well , I don't want to sacrifice my Netflix at night , or I don't want to sacrifice , you know , my time in bed in the morning and I'm like well , just combine them then .

NIka Lawrie 28:37

Yeah .

Farah Miltimore 28:38

If you're laying in bed in the morning and you're telling me you don't have time to meditate , but you're , you're in bed already . Just plug something in on YouTube , listen to it for 10 minutes while you're laying there and you're done . So , um , I think it's . It's not sacrificing the things that you want to do . It's not making these big time commitments is just saying to yourself I'm important , I matter , and in order for me to succeed in my business to succeed and for my online community to grow , I have to make sure that I'm good and then , from there , do all the other things you need to do in a day .

NIka Lawrie 29:17

I love . One of my favorite things to do is actually to meditate in the afternoon , so the like five o'clock kind of thing . It's a little weird with the pandemic now because time just merges , but when I used to come home from a nine to five job , I would come home and I would just rest for the first 20 minutes or so . I'd have my daughter go watch a show or play in a room or do something just to kind of entertain herself and I would take just those 20 minutes , sometimes even just 10 minutes , to meditate , just to decompress . And I became such a better parent when I did that . I just connected on a whole different level for the whole rest of the night . So I'd given myself enough time to kind of recharge and reset and I think it's such a valuable tool that's such a simple , free thing , I know , I know Well .

Farah Miltimore 30:07

we end up bringing the day home with us too .

NIka Lawrie 30:10

Yeah , yeah .

Farah Miltimore 30:11

And it's unfair to us and to those that we live with to really put that on them . So taking that 15 , 20 minutes to just decompress and let it go makes a world of difference , hugely .

NIka Lawrie 30:27

Definitely yeah . So a lot of people kind of we're going a little different subject , but we talked about this a little bit earlier A lot of people really struggle with turning something that they love into a business or into something that's kind of life-changing for them .

Finding Purpose Through Joy and Skills

NIka Lawrie 30:44

Usually that relates back to fear or , like you had mentioned , ego and judgment and that kind of stuff . Do you have any suggestions for people on how they might overcome that ? Like , how do you work through those fears or work through those issues of the ego ?

Farah Miltimore 30:58

telling you not to Absolutely so . My favorite thing to do with people is for them to make lists . So you make two lists on the same piece of paper . You have a left column and then the right column on one side . Write things that bring me joy , all the things anything puppies , rainbows , whatever it is personally and professionally the things that make you really happy on one side and then , on the other side , write down the things that you're really good at doing , whether it's personal or professional , and then , like in grade school , connecting the ones that match right . So , if I'm really good at teaching and talking to people brings me joy , I'm going to connect those two and then , as you're connecting , you're going to start seeing similarities in the things that you're connecting , and then things that bring you joy and , even better , the things that you're good at . So from there , you can either create something brand new or it'll open your eyes to new things that you may not even thought of doing . Right , right , so you could be a really good at painting and it brings you joy . You may decide to start painting more and selling your paintings or creating an online store for those things and just being very open-minded .

Farah Miltimore 32:20

We're very close-minded on the jobs right and the careers . We try to stick to doing what other people have already done , what other labels people have already given themselves , instead of opening up our eyes to new experiences , to being curious about different things , doing the research and understanding what people do for a living and where they do it and how they do it . So , if you want to work from home , what are the things that bring you joy , that you can do while you're at home and make money to relieve that stress at the same time ? So I think being really open and honest with yourself and opening up your eyes and being curious about what's out there and then making the list of okay , well , what am I good at and what makes me happy , and bringing those two together will really help people get out of that rut , out of , you know , not knowing what to do and exploring new things .

NIka Lawrie 33:21

I love that , because one of the things that I really kind of stand behind when trying to find your purpose is looking at what you love , what you're good at and what do other people need help with . What you're good at and what do other people need help with , and so connecting those three is really a great way for you to start a business or yeah , exactly , and it's .

Farah Miltimore 33:41

It's so amazing how answers will start coming to you when you start trying to solve problems for other people . So when I was in network marketing helping myself stand out , I was selling makeup and skincare . But I'm like , okay , a lot of people are also doing this . How am I going to stand out ? What do my customers and my clients and my audience what of new babies that didn't have time to put makeup on ? So I started doing five minute makeup tutorials on Facebook live and showing them the products that they needed , just to get their makeup done in five minutes and for them to feel good about themselves . Yeah , my brand started growing . My recognition started growing because I was solving problems for people with the products that I have .

Online Business Success and Purpose

Farah Miltimore 34:37

So I think you're right when we disconnect right from what is it that I need to what is it that my audience needs and how can I help people , how can I serve them ? Then purpose starts to end , a purpose starts to come up to light . But you also want to be really careful not to be hard on yourself . I didn't know what my purpose was , you know , and and some days I still don't know , and it's like I have to . I had to give myself . Some people were born to write books , some people were born to speak , some people were born to teach . Whatever it is , and if it doesn't come to you instantly , don't give up on yourself . Yeah , yeah , purpose , you know , it's all about timing . It will come to you when it's ready to come to you and my favorite thing is you know what's meant for you will never miss you .

NIka Lawrie 35:32

Right yeah .

Farah Miltimore 35:33

Right , it will never miss you . So , um , we just have to . We just have to stay hopeful , yeah , and enjoy the journey .

NIka Lawrie 35:43

Absolutely , yeah . Yeah , so you , I mean , you've kind of already hit on a couple of those , but for someone who wants to start a business online or , you know , create a project , um related to their superpower , you know what are some tips or advice that you have for those who don't really know where to start and how to move forward ?

Farah Miltimore 36:02

So I think the first and foremost , find the things that make you happiest . Don't chase money , because if you chase the money , the money runs away from us . So if someone says to you well , I started doing this and it's making me thousands of dollars , you should probably do it with me . I want you to sit back and really think okay , if I do this , first of all , do you resonate with what they're doing ? And second of all , does it feel right ? And third of all , is it going to make you happy ? But if you're chasing the dollar , it's still . You may make the money , but it still may not make you happy , and then you'll end up quitting eventually anyways or stopping doing that .

Farah Miltimore 36:40

So figure out what brings you the most joy . Find products and services that , when you think about them or when you talk about them , you light up and people can immediately tell that you're being genuine about them . Genuine about them and stay true to who you are and what you believe in and your values . And , most importantly , you got to get over yourself . You got to get over it . You got to get over yourself . People are going to judge you . People are going to say things . People aren't going to like what you're doing . People will come to you and tell you that what you're doing is dumb . They don't think you're going to make any money doing it or whatever it is . But you've got to stay true to knowing that you're going to make this work , whatever it is . So just start , honestly start , jump in and if it doesn't work , it doesn't work . I've tried so many things and launched so many different products and so many different services that fell flat .

NIka Lawrie 37:45

And I think we all have . We all have been here in online business . It's , like you know , one out of every 15 works Exactly and it's a learning experience , right ?

Farah Miltimore 37:56

A lot of us take it as we take failure , as a personality trait . Most people will say I'm a failure , but you're not a failure . You may have tried and the thing that you launched , or the product or whatever that may have failed and it didn't work out , but you and yourself are never failure . It's not a personality trait , it's just a life experience . And now we move on and we try a new thing . Um , so take those lessons , learn from them , get over yourself and understand that you'll , you'll , it'll work as long as you work and you take action . Um , and don't just , don't , just don't just post and pray , especially for online business .

Farah Miltimore 38:38

Post and pray does not work . My friends cannot post and then go . Everyone is going to reach out to me . It's not how it works . No , it's not . You're going to post and post and post and post and post and then maybe they'll reach out . But you also have to do the work . You have to reach out to people . You have to create relationships also have to do the work . You have to reach out to people . You have to create relationships .

Farah Miltimore 38:58

You have to engage with them . Um , you can't build a following over . You can't build a genuine following . It has to take um time and you gotta be okay with that when you're building online business and understand that it's going to take you a long time to build that engagement and that community , and you have to be willing to take the time to do that .

NIka Lawrie 39:19

I think it's funny , because I love that , because I see so often that people think oh , social media , you just post and the world comes to you and the reality is an online business is almost the exact same thing as having a brick and mortar business . You still have to do that ground networking you it's still . You may not be going in person to everybody's office , but you're still knocking on all those doors virtually . And so same thing , yeah .

Farah Miltimore 39:45

And if you can knock on their doors in person , you still should . Yeah , I build online businesses , but I have a lot of in-person meetings within my community because people need to understand , like this has been said for so many years , that your network equals your net worth , because the people that you end up connecting with , whether they buy from you or hire you or whatever it is , is irrelevant about building connections and building networks so that one day they go , hey , I've got this friend , and then that friend goes , hey , you want this a hundred thousand dollar contract . And you go , well , yes , I do . Well , yes , thank you , my friend . So I think it's that's really important . Online business is taken as this easy breezy let's just post and have a party and it's it's hard . It's hard and it's hard work , but you have to be consistent yeah you have to do .

Farah Miltimore 40:43

You , you gotta do . You can't do anyone else because they will know . If you see something and it sounds good and then you copy and paste it without giving the other person recognition , or if you just tweak it a little bit , your audience still knows that that it's not you .

Farah Miltimore 41:00

So those posts that don't get a lot of engagement are usually the posts that you're trying to force something out . You're just trying to force that point or force that sale or whatever it is . Your audience will not react well to that . They will not engage . React well to that . They will not engage , whereas really just consistently and constantly putting your brand , which is you essentially . It's that emotional reaction people get when they see your posts , when they see an email from you , when they get a correspondence from you . Your brand recognition is well , how do I want them to feel when they see my name , or when they see my face , or when they see that I posted a new picture of , I sent them an email or whatever it is . So when in building a personal brand online , that's the key , that's the and that's where your superpower comes in , like , I want people to know this , this and this about me , and your messaging has to stay consistent , as you're doing that in order to build that Absolutely .

NIka Lawrie 41:58

Totally agree . So , Farrah , I have two more questions for you . The first one is is leading right into this . So where can my listeners connect with you online ? How can they find you ?

Farah Miltimore 42:09

They can find me almost everywhere . Um , so I'm on . I'm on Instagram at Farrah Miltimore . Um , facebook is also Farrah Miltimore . I'm on Tik TOK at Farrah Miltimore Twitter , linkedin , youtube , all the places and I just have to look up my name and I and I'm there .

NIka Lawrie 42:32

Awesome . I'll also link to it in the show notes too . But yeah , okay

Creating Change Through Giving and Sharing

NIka Lawrie 42:37

. So my last question for you what advice do you have for someone who wants to make change either in their life , in their community or even around the world ?

Farah Miltimore 42:52

Creating change . I think is the most important thing to remember is that it's not about us the recognition after creating change or after giving or being generous , it's not about us in the act of giving . It's about how are the people feeling when they're receiving . Is it , you know ? Is it for them ? So when we started um , I also run a passion project called talk 11 , which is a speaker series where , pre COVID , we would have live speaking event and people will come on stage and we give them 11 minutes and they're they share their story .

NIka Lawrie 43:38

Oh , I love that .

Farah Miltimore 43:38

But what my partner and I do is we sit down with everyone . We help them build their 11 minutes . We help them provide the most impact that they can with their story . Doing that and at first we're like this would be a great platform for us and it'd be great to build our brands with and stuff . And then , after the first event , we sat down and I looked at Matt and I said it has absolutely nothing to do with us . And he goes .

Farah Miltimore 44:01

I know it just clicked and I think whether you want to make a change , if you want to make a change for you and your life personally , then yes , you have to do it for you . You cannot do it for anyone else . Me losing the weight , me getting happy , me changing my businesses , me doing all that stuff that had to do with me had no one else . You know , yo-yoing before with my weight and my diet was because I was doing it for society , for my family and to get a boyfriend at that point in my life , right , so that's what I was doing it for and it never worked . It never worked .

Farah Miltimore 44:37

So people say , oh , did you get healthy for your kids ? And I said , no , I get healthy , I got healthy for me so that I could be there for my kids . So if you're going to make a change for yourself , you got to do it for you . If you want to make a change in the world , you have to do it for the world and not for you , and I think that's where that's . That , I think , is what helps people understand and make that pivot into okay , well , what can I do to help others in a way that's going to create bigger change than what I expected ? And to just to be open and to understand that your , your vulnerability , is so courageous and it's so heroic and that in sharing um , not only do you help yourself heal and you help yourself change and evolve , you do the same for the world and for those listening .

NIka Lawrie 45:28

I just love that . Oh , thank you . Yes , yeah , I got like goosebumps listening to you , so I love it . Yeah , Awesome . Well , farrah , thank you so so much for your time , for your insight , your knowledge and just all the work that you do for your clients and just help making the world a better place .

Farah Miltimore 45:46

So thank you . Thank you so much and thanks for having me again . It was so much fun chatting with you today Awesome .

NIka Lawrie 45:52

Thank you .